This post is for my readers in and near Monroe, Mich.

Trent and Lily’s Resale Boutique, 513 N. Telegraph Rd., Monroe, Mich., is advertising that it is purchasing name brand, gently used fall and winter clothing from Nov. 9-25.

There’s also a 15 percent off coupon for your entire purchase at Trent and Lily’s in this month’s Saving Sense book distributed by The Monroe Evening News.

The store’s phone number is (734) 457-0574.

Here are the sales fliers that were in my home-delivery edition of The Monroe Evening News today (I live in the 48162 zip code):

• Saving Sense coupon booklet – which can be downloaded on line – has coupons for local businesses such as the very popular popcorn coupons for Phoenix Theater, cranberries and pecans at Flour Garden, a free cookie at Inga’s Bakery, dinner deals at McGeady’s.
• Wal-Mart (sale starts Sunday) has an assortment of board games ranging from $5 to $18. Assorted Transformers at $10 each. Star Wars lightsaber at $15.
• Rite Aid (sale starts Sunday) will have buy one get one free on Maxfields boxed chocolate, Nature Made vitamins, assorted ground coffee, and Rite Aid brand aspirin. Boxed Christmas cards buy one get two free. Russell Stover and Mrs. Fields boxed candy $3.99. Finish dishwasher soap on Single Check Rebate.
• Staples (sale starts Sunday) will have Dollar Days deals on fashion notebooks, RoseArt colored pencils and envelopes. Easy Rebate deals on copy paper and photo paper. Coupon in flier for a free PC tuneup.
• Busch’s Fine Foods (sale starts Monday) will have buy one pound get one pound free on Miller Farms chicken breast. Buy any 10 participating Kraft products get $5 off – the offer is good in Miracle Whip, Velveeta shells and cheese and Kraft chunk cheese.

This post is for my readers in southeast Michigan and northwest Ohio:

The churches of Whiteford Township in Monroe County, Mich., have announced they will have free food on a “first come, first served” basis for any Ohio or Michigan resident during a distribution from 10 a.m. to noon Saturday Nov. 21 at Crossroads Community Church, 6960 Sylvania-Petersburg Rd., Ottawa Lake, Mich.

The only requirement will be to provide your name and the number of people in your family to the distribution crew.

The following article is intended for my readers in Monroe County, Mich., and was in today’s edition of The Monroe Evening News. But I’d like all of you to note the paragraph I put in red:

The Detroit News has this report, Michigan child support pleas flood courts.

A snippet:

Parents pinched by the recession are flooding courts across the state with requests for reductions in child support payments.

In Wayne County, requests for payment adjustments have doubled. Courts there and across southeast Michigan are prioritizing such cases to expedite relief to strapped payers, officials said. These requests, called modification motions, illustrate the ripple effect of the state’s economic contraction that reaches across multiple households and reduces the dollars available for children.

“I feel sick,” said Terry McCleery. The 48-year-old dad said he would like to pay more child support but sought a reduction in Wayne County after he was laid off from an auto supplier in May. “That’s less money going to my daughter. I ran out of money. I had no choice.”

The article, and the situations it brings to light, has resulted in some chatter on the MonroeTalks forums.

I have no experience with the Michigan Friend of the Court System. The child support for my daughter was handled through the Ohio Job and Family Services. The last check came in 2007 as she turned 18.

I did, however, have to deal with occasional situations over the years when my ex-husband was between jobs and the child support was late or on hold until his next paycheck arrived. In the meantime, I still had bills to pay. So I can speak from experience to the parents who are waiting for child support and either don’t see it coming, or it’s late, or it’s a partial check …

In a perfect world, such a thing would never happen. The full child support payments would always arrive on time. The child’s needs, after all, do not go away just because a parent is unemployed.

The reality is: split parents where one or both is unemployed have to work around money issues for the kids. It’s no different than if someone in the household became unemployed. And I’ve been in THAT situation too.

If you are the parent who is receiving money, here are some practical tips to deal with late or non-existent child support relating to joblessness:

• Stay in close contact with your case worker on details such as whether a revision of the court order is likely and what to expect in the long run. This is not a new situation for the agencies – they’ve been dealing with jobless parent matters all along. The difference now is in the number of revision requests they are handling.
• Find every means possible to cut back on household expenses so you have the flexibility to handle a late, shorted or nonexistent child support payment. Use my Downsized Budget series as a guide of where to look for cash flow savings.
• Seek out and use discount and money-saving programs and services that rely more on special circumstances or your own efforts than strictly on household income. Reason: child support is often included as income on assistance applications. Whether or not you are getting that money right now may or may not be relevant.
• All parents and children involved in these situations need to discuss — or at least be aware of — the priorities for any money that is available. It is likely that the family will have to cut back on student activities such as music lessons, sports involvement, Christmas gift budgets and summer camp until the situation improves. Another idea that worked at one point for my family: Can the children by cared for by the unemployed parent on at least a part-time basis so the working parent doesn’t have to spend as much money on day care?
• If the affected child is college age or soon-to-be, make sure you understand the rules that apply at the federal level, in your state, and at your college, for divorced parents and their household income. Check out the Divorce and Financial Aid section at FinAid.com.

Have you seen the Sears TV ad where the couple tells the sales clerk “We only shop on Black Friday,” and the clerk is explaining there are deals to look for BEFORE Black Friday?

Yes. Pick up the Sears ad that’s in your newspapers today. I’m looking at the one in the Detroit Free Press that shows a variety of winter coats for $19.99 on Saturday morning. Toys R Us also has doorbuster specials this weekend.

Now, let’s talk about that situation.

I know the retail industry created the Black Friday buzz. The Detroit News explained in a feature story last year that Hudson’s held a sale on the day after Thanksgiving in 1981 and opened the store one hour early. That sale became the start what we know now as Black Friday shopping promotions.

But while the TV stations and newspapers do Black Friday stories featuring the long lines outside the mall or whatever store is hosting the deal of the day, many other stores don’t get that boost in retail business. Some, in fact, get lower traffic than usual that day.

I was a reporter for The News Herald in Port Clinton, Ohio, in November 1997,  when my editor told me to go do a local story on Black Friday shoppers. I discovered a very empty downtown at lunchtime as compared to the regular business day traffic. That scenario was most certainly NOT fitting in with the buzz of the day.

The following year, I planned my news article based on where the local Black Friday shoppers could be found. They were at Wal-Mart a couple of miles out of the city limits, waiting for a 6 a.m. opening.

And if you live in Monroe, Mich., these days, you know that the downtown Monroe district holds its Christmas festivities and tree lighting ceremony on the weekend BEFORE Thanksgiving.

The stores that schedule early sales are being practical. They would like to get some of your shopping dollars. Waiting until Black Friday for a promotion makes absolutely no sense for stores that won’t be able to compete for attention with lines at the mall and big box stores.

It’s smart for even the big guys to spread out their sales promotions over a few weeks so that their employees are not so overwhelmed on Black Friday.

Cyber Monday is also a factor these days, with a noticeably huge spike in Internet purchases made on the Monday after Thanksgiving.

So if Black Friday shopping is part of your traditions, fine. Have fun!

But don’t assume that will be the only day in which you can find the Christmas deals. It’s not. You need to be watching those sales fliers now, and pay close attention for a few weeks.

What should you do when a friend asks for money?

First: read the Nov. 5 Dear Abby column:

A snippet:

“Dear Friend, Family Member or Co-Worker: You came to me in a state of panic — unable to make your car payment, pay your lawyer’s fee, your taxes or the light bill. You asked for my help. I gave it to you because I respected and trusted you enough to go out on a limb for you. Please honor your promise to repay me without my having to ask you. …

This topic is not a new one. Many other columnists, financial experts and wise people have discussed it over the years. The bottom line is: If you can’t afford to make the requested money an outright gift to a family member or friend in financial need, do not lend it and do not co-sign for it.

I know you feel bad when someone you know and love is struggling financially. In today’s economy, many people are dealing with circumstances they’ve never seen before and have no idea what to do and where to turn.

There are lots of very practical steps you can take to help out a friend in financial need. They include:

• Research community resources such as emergency utility bill assistance, transportation and carpool services, community legal services, emergency home repair programs.
• Drive them to the resume workshops, financial literacy classes, job fairs, food pantries or the discount grocery store that they normally can’t get to.
• Offer to get photocopies made of key documents that they’ll need when applying for assistance from government and non-profit agencies.
• Help them organize, advertise and run a garage sale, Mom 2 Mom sale booth or online auction.
• Buy money-saving gadgets and grocery gift cards for birthdays and holidays. …

The most helpful thing to do is everything you can EXCEPT loaning your own money or accessing your own credit.

It can be very difficult for a friend or family member to determine whether a financial emergency is based more on bad circumstances or more on bad financial planning. But if the real problem is financial mismanagement, the fiscal damage needs to be limited to their household — and not involve yours.

The last appearance on the budget blogger’s fall schedule will be the Monroe Lunch Bunch at 10:30 a.m. Thursday Nov. 12 at the Michigan State University Extension Service office, 963 S. Raisinville Rd., Monroe, Mich.

Em gave a nice plug for me at Mom Moments. Yes this meeting is open to all families in Monroe, bring your own lunch is the deal, that’s why they are called the “Lunch Bunch.”

I also spoke at the Monroe Exchange Club today and when one of my co-workers heard about that presentation, she said, “Well, then, you should also be speaking to (another local civic) club!”

Because we’re coming up on the holiday season and most groups book their speakers at least a month in advance, I think Lunch Bunch will be my last one for the fall. But I do already have a booking for March.

My “club presentation” can be found here although I have since had to update the script a bit. My “community education” class can be found here. The program that I have co-hosted for a Toledo audience can be found here.

This post is for my readers in Monroe, Mich.:

Frenchtown Square, 2121 N. Monroe St., Monroe, Mich., has announced it will open its doors at 6 a.m. Friday Nov. 27 (aka Black Friday). The details are on a full-page ad on page 10B in today’s print and e-editions of The Monroe Evening News that lists the mall’s holiday special events.

The first 100 mall shoppers at the food court entrance will receive a free goody bag filled with holiday offers from mall stores.

I use a plastic index card box with index card dividers to store and sort my coupons. It holds all the coupons my family needs and is small enough to fit in my tote bag when I go shopping.

But the box system frustrates a lot of people, so I’ve been mentioning other methods when I do my civic club and community education programs.

One of the popular systems right now is a coupon binder. For example, my friend Candy at Deal with it, Simply! uses a binder. When Candy and I do frugal living programs in the Toledo area, Candy brings her coupon binder and I bring my coupon box so the audience can see there is more than one idea that works.

If you’d like to try a binder system, Dimes 2 Vines has pictures and instructions so you can see how a coupon binder is assembled.