There have always been presents on Christmas morning in our home, but it’s never been a big pile.

The year my daughter was born, in 1989, her dad was attending community college and working part-time. I was working full-time, but had been on several weeks of unpaid maternity leave that summer. We had just moved to a two-bedroom apartment and there was hardly a stick of furniture in the living room.

The “big” present we decided to give our daughter was a Cabbage Patch Kids baby doll. We didn’t have the money to purchase it by Christmas. But there were a couple of packages under the tree for her to open. More gifts were waiting at the grandparents’ homes. Two weeks after Christmas, her dad and I had enough cash to buy our daughter the baby doll (and she loved it!)

The following Christmas, 1990, was my first holiday as a single parent. Same verse, worse than the first. My daughter did open something on Christmas morning at home, although I don’t remember what. I do remember that the money people gave me that year for Christmas was used to catch up on bills.

Despite the circumstances, my daughter didn’t lack for presents. There were gifts waiting at other relatives’ houses. Some people spent a lot, some people spent a little. When it was all said and done, she had plenty of new toys, videos and clothes to enjoy.

By the time she was old enough to remember any details, our family custom was established. There would be two or three packages and a stocking full of candy for everyone on Christmas morning, carefully selected to that person’s tastes and interests. We never had a pile of gifts as tall as the Christmas tree. Only once did we purchase the “electronic toy of the year.” And I never encouraged her to ask grandparents or other relatives for gifts I felt that they could not afford.

Those of you who are parents of young children have the opportunity to set the tone for your holiday gift-giving traditions before expectations get out of control. If you need practical tips on how to do that, beingfrugal.net has some great tips in 5 Ways to Keep the Gimmies Away This Christmas.