Been awhile since anybody has posted. Guess I might as well put something up here. Well, in case you haven’t noticed the holidays are right around the corner. And of course, since it’s that time of year again, that can only mean one thing: Absurdly good deals on the day after Thanksgiving. Now personally, I’m a pretty big Black Friday shopping guy. I tend to get up early, and see what I can get without camping out (I actually had to just recently do that for the Xbox deal I mentioned a few weeks ago…). Generally, I’m able to score a decent amount of cheap games and DVD’s, as well as picking up a few things for friends/ family members for the Christmas season.

So anyway, since I’ve been wasting countless hours scouring the Internet for shabbily taken phone camera pics of Black Friday ads, I figured I’d save you the pain and anguish, and post some of the better deals right on here.

So sit back, relax, and make a note or two of the deals that interest you.

Note: An “*” means this is a hot deal, and will sell out FAST. Also, the more asterisks you see, the hotter the deal is.

Video Game Deals

Dragon Age (Xbox 360/ PS3): 34.99 at Best Buy *

Left for Dead 2 (Xbox360/ PS3): 34.99 at Best Buy *

Brutal Legend (Xbox 360/ PS3): 34.99 at Best Buy

Fifa 10 (360/ PS3): 34.99 at Best Buy

Madden 10 (360/ PS3): 34.99 at Best Buy *

Resident Evil 5 (360/ PS3): 34.99 at Best Buy

NHL 10 (360/ PS3): 34.99 at Best Buy

Batman Arkham Asylum (360/ PS3): 37.00 at Target

Ultimate Alliance 2 (360/ Ps3/ Wii): 37.00 at Target

Wii Sports Resort, comes with 10 dollar gift card (Wii): 49.99 at Target

Modern Warfare 2 (360/ PS3), comes with 10 dollar gift card: 59.99 at Target

NBA 2K10 (360/ Ps3): 24.99 at Walmart *

Grand Theft Auto IV (360/ Ps3?): 10.00 at Walmart *

Tiger Woods PGA Tour 10 (Wii): 24.99 at Walmart *

Rock Band Special Edition, comes with game, guitar, drums, and mic (360/ Ps3): 49.99 ***

Video Game Console Deals

Slim Playstation 3 with 120 gb Hard drive, with games Infamous, Batman: Arkham Asylum, and The Dark Knight on Blu-Ray: 299.99 at Walmart   **** (Camp out if you even want a chance at getting this)

Xbox 360 Call of Duty Super Elite edition, comes with 50 dollar gift card: 399. at Target ***

DS Lite: 98.00 at Walmart ****

Purchase (Any) Xbox 360 system or bundle, get Grand Theft Auto IV and Halo 3 FREE: at Meijer ***

Nintendo Wii console, with 50 dollar gift card: 199.99 at Meijer ****

Nintendo DSi Mario Bundle (Metallic Blue) w/$20 Gift Card: $169.99 at Best Buy **

Misc. Video Game Deals

Free Lego Rockband with 20 dollar purchase:  at Old Navy **

50% off any game priced 19.99: at Meijer

20 dollar gift card with any DSi system purchase: at Best Buy

Over 50 different games on sale for 7.00: at Walmart *

Over 40 different games on sale for 10.00: at Walmart *

Over 30 different games on sale for 25.00: at Walmart ***

Okay, that’s all for now. In a few days I’ll post more deals on some other stuff. In closing, here’s a quick tip that you should all know:

READ THIS: Wal-Mart, Target, and if I’m not mistaken, Best Buy all price match other ads on Black Friday. So basically, if you don’t feel like camping out for something, there’s a chance you may be able to get the same item for the same price, at a different store. Just be sure you have the actual ad for the item you are wanting to price match. I’m not for sure on this, but a lot of times stores won’t match ads from online, and they NEVER price match Internet prices. So just to be sure, pick up a Sunday paper on the 22nd to be prepared.

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I’ve just been informed from multiple sources that this weekend (starting Saturday), Walmart will be selling an Xbox 360 Arcade edition for the normal price of 200 dollars. However, they will include a 100 dollar gift card along with the purchase. That’s almost like getting a brand new Xbox 360 for a 100 dollars. Now of course, the Arcade edition of the Xbox 360 doesn’t come with a hard drive, but if you really wanted to, you could take that 100 dollar gift card and purchase a 60 gb hard drive for 89.99 plus tax. Or if you wanted to be really thrifty, you could look online for a refurbished hard drive, as those will only run you about 30-50 bucks. Either way you are virtually getting an Xbox 360 Pro for around 150-160 (compared to the normal 300 dollar price tag). This is an awesome deal for Christmas, and if you have been thinking about picking up an Xbox 360, now is definitely the time to do so.
TL;DR (too lazy; didn’t read) version: Walmart is selling an Xbox 360 Arcade for 200 dollars, and will also include a 100 dollar gift card upon purchase starting this Saturday until some time next week.

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”Shoe vs. Bush ” : No one  seems to be better at dodging shoes than George Bush, and no one would make a more unique costume than such as this one. The idea here is pretty simple: Ex President George Bush seems to have the uncanny ability to be able to dodge shoes, and because of this, has gotten millions of views of him exhibiting quick reflexes on the Internets. Say what you want about our Ex prez. In my book, anybody with spider sense can’t be all bad.

How to do it: Get yourself a Bush mask of some sort (they sell these pretty cheap at places), a suit, and then a shoe of some sort. You’re going to want to either glue the shoe on to the mask somehow, or figure out some other way for it to remain on your head. Either way, just try and look confused all the time and you shouldn’t have too much trouble staying in character.

“This costume is a hoax.”: A couple weeks ago, the entire country was mesmerized for an hour or so by a floating, metallic looking balloon that was carrying a six year old boy nearly 5,000 feet above the ground. Sometime later, the balloon touched down, but the boy was not inside. Later that day, it was revealed that the little boy was hiding in a box inside his attic. Turns out there was no balloon boy at all, and the whole thing was just a big hoax.

And now here comes the part that involves the greatest (or fakest rather) costume ever conceived. Based on the sheer hype that this story received, almost everybody will recognize you if you dress up as Balloon Boy.

How to do it: The costume itself is pretty simple. You actually have two choices here. One, would require you to purchase an ungodly amount of aluminum foil, then wrap yourself in it, until it looks like a circle/ balloon. Then you just kind of float/ dance around the Halloween party/ event that you are attending. The second way to do it is even easier. Just find a large box of some sort, and find a make shift way to strap it around your body (try rope, or duct tape). Then when people ask what you are supposed to be (even though they should already know), just reply like so: “Daddy told me to dress like this for our show.” Hopefully they will get it then, and not think that you are some kind of crazed hobo.

“Dead Celebs”: This Halloween year, the streets are sure to be filled with thousands of people dressing up as Michael Jackson, most of them pretending to impersonate him, when the truth is most of these people didn’t even like Michael Jackson before he died. So in order to combat this mainstream wave of costume ideas, why not take a different spin on this design? 2009 has been a terrible year to be a celebrity. Everyone from Michael Jackson, to Farrah Fawcett, to Patrick Swayze have all kicked the bucket this year. So what better way to show your respect for these people than to dress up as them. And better yet, why not add a bit more to this, by going as the “undead” version of said celebs. Who wouldn’t want to see a Zombie Swayze busting a move out on the dance floor?

How to do it: Just Google a picture of your favorite dead celebrity, pick out their wardrobe (it’s pretty easy to find this stuff at Goodwill), and then apply some grayish makeup to make you look 6 feet under. Also consider adding a grayish wig, some blood/ gash marks along the skin, and even a severed limb or two for dramatic effect.

“BILLY MAYS HERE WITH MY ALL NEW AWESOME COSTUME 2000!”: Now I know most of you are thinking this should belong with the dead celebs category, but I think this costume is so special and unique it deserves its own entry. Just a few months ago one of America’s greatest salesmen of all time passed away. I am of course talking about the late Billy Mays. So what better way to honor the great pitch man, than to dress up as him?

How to do it: First, you will need to get yourself a blue buttoned up dress shirt, along with some khaki pants. Then you are going to want to find some kind of fake beard. You can either make one yourself (it shouldn’t be too hard), or you can just buy one from a costume store. Next, you are going to want to buy some of Billy’s products to carry around as props. A container of Oxi Clean, and a spray bottle of KABOOM will work just fine. If you’re really brave, you could always try lugging around an AWESOME AUGER, but I don’t suggest doing this. To play the part of Billy Mays, just simply walk around your party/ event and talk in a really loud/ obnoxious voice. Asking random people if they have ever tried any of your products before could also be a real hoot. Finally (and let me just add this is the most important aspect to pulling off a successful Billy Mays), if anything is spilled, dumped, etc. be sure to instantly begin cleaning up the stain with one of your chosen cleaning products while simultaneously making statements such as, “LOOK AT THE AMAZING CLEANING POWER OF OXI CLEAN. AND JUST LIKE THAT, KAABOOM TAKES THE STAIN RIGHT OUT. KAAAABOOOM!!!” Just remember to be as loud and obnoxious as possible when doing this, and you should be fine.

“This is the best costume of all time. OF ALL TIME.”: It seems as if everyone has something to say about Kanye West’s latest ignoramus stunt, including President Obama. This costume idea is perfect for those who like to crash their friend’s parties, and just kind of show up for stuff. It’s also great if you happen to be one of those people who love to hear themselves talk.

How to do it: First off, you need to figure out a way to paint your face black (if you’re white that is, if you’re already black then just skip this step), either brown face paint (which doesn’t work great, I’ve tried it), or a dark colored mascara should do the trick. After that you are going to want to buy some black sunglasses/ shutter shades (you can buy these cheap online), a black shirt, and light blue jeans. To top it off, you may also want to buy a hand microphone to complete the outfit. Now all you need to do is to walk around the Halloween party/ event that you are attending, and randomly interrupt people who are talking. Example: “I’m real happy for you and your party, and I’mma let you finish havin’ it, but Mike had one of the best Halloween parties of all time! OF ALL TIME!” Eventually after doing this enough, people will really start to get sick of you, and may possibly even yell/ threaten you. At this point you should just shrug your shoulders, thus fully completing the Kanye West costume.

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Terrible Tuesday it is and be it nearly 6am in the morning I just finished watching the newest episode of the critically acclaimed “Dexter” which airs on Showtime and is already in its fourth season. First let me get this out of the way before I even explain what this show means to me personally. The acting in this movie is solid, but the main characters acting is great, let me repeat, Michael C. Hall (Dexter) is the first actor that has ever taken me on a journey that almost makes me care more about his life circumstances than my own, or better yet, when watching this show I become Dexter Morgan.On top of having superb actors, “Dexter” has a storyline to kill for. Dexter Morgan is your everyday serial killer except he kills with a code in mind instilled at an early age from his father. Simply put, the code is a boundary that tells Dexter to make sure that he only kills the guilty, the murderers who have yet to be caught or put away.  If you may have somehow knew already that Dexter is in fact a killing bounty hunter, well this show deals with much more than just that, it deals with Dexter as he often questions his fathers code, childhood, job, friends, family, his own victims, and even his own secret. In fact, much of the commentary you hear happens to be his thoughts as a moment is happening. “Dexter” finds a way to balance dark comedy and seriousness it seems at all times, and hardly ever skips a beat in each episode where at the end you will find yourself yearning to know what is going to happen now, or asking “how does he get out of this one?”

Dexter calls himself “The Dark Passenger” because his need to kill is actually his inner self that he’s not sure sure he can stop. The psychological aspect of this show between right and wrong, good and evil, habits, urges, and even family life actually easily relates to ones own life. If Dexter could stop his need to kill, he would…Dexter wonders why he is so different than everyone else…Deb, Dexter’s sister has deep emotional problems she fights…these issues actually relate to us on an emotional level because we can understand them, well except for the need to kill but you know what I mean.

“Dexter certainly isn’t a show for the weak of heart, or anyone that has trouble dismissing multiple ”F bombs” thrown out by Deb at all times but it is a show that has the ability to make the audience feel personally involved as they follow Dexter Morgans life and begin to feel empathy towards him and agree with his code. Luckily for anyone that hasn’t seen Dexter, there are three (awesome) seasons out on DVD where you can non-stop watch Dexter without having to wait week by week to see what happens next, unless you get to season 4 of course.

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If anyone reads this, my counterpart Admin1 has alerted me that at Best Buy this Sunday through Halloween there is a freaking buy 2 ($60 or less), get a 3rd game free. Thats right, if anyone reading this has the courage to splunker down $120 (plus tax) they can receive another game of $60 worth for FREE…this seems like a pretty decent deal and one that should come around more often given we’re in a recession and all, though spending this type of dough on games won’t necessarily bring us back, it will save you 60 bucks. Ok, now you know if you didn’t know, logging on to Cynical Critics has some redeeming value after all! If I hear anything else this incredible or something about this changes I will update for sure!

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So apparently the movie “Paranormal Activity” got re-released to theaters this weekend. And apparently it’s a pretty big deal. Heh. I would never have guessed it after checking it out on Friday. That’s not to say that it’s a horrible movie by any means, I just found it to be rather bad. Anyway, if you’re considering checking it out then I suggest sticking around. But let’s get on with it, shall we?

Well, there it is. In case you haven’t been paying attention to the latest movie buzz, allow me to give you a bit of a back story on Paranormal. First off, it should be noted that this is one of the highest rated horror movies in recent times, (so right off the bat, you know I’m going against actual critics here). The movie was originally intended to be limited release only, but because of a supposed huge backing from fans via the Internet, the movie ended up going to theaters everywhere this past weekend. The movie itself has been incredibly hyped, almost on the level of The Blair Witch Project. With trailers touting the phrase, “DON’T SEE IT ALONE” and “SO SCARY YOU MIGHT NOT MAKE IT THROUGH IT”, and my personal favorite “HOLY CRAP, I JUST WENT AND SAW THIS MOVIE, AND I ENDED UP PEEING MY PANTS DURING IT. I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE. NO SERIOUSLY, IT REALLY IS THAT SCARY.” Okay, so maybe I made that last one up, but you get the point. Needless to say I went in with pretty high hopes.

What I got instead, was a rather ambitious attempt at trying something new, but ultimately turned into nothing more than an hour and a half, hyped up bore fest. I’m going to try to describe what I mean by saying the movie was “boring”, but the thing is, what’s boring to one person may be exciting to another, so bare with me. Let me start off by examining the more concrete aspects of the movie. Paranormal Activity uses the ever popular “hand-cam” to tell its story. As a result, the cinematography is a bit on the weak side, however, I understand the director’s purpose here. The hand cam is an obvious attempt at trying to make the movie come across as being real (in fact the whole movie is presented this way, there even is a missing credits list at the end of the movie to make it seem more like a documentary), and for the most part it works. This is probably one of the better usages of the hand cam in a movie that I have seen. Paranormal Activity doesn’t suffer from the nauseating “shaky” camera effect that plagued Cloverfield, and overall the hand cam works quite positively for Paranormal.

Now, I know the acting in this movie is supposed to represent “real life”, or people not acting, but I would be a dumb review guy if I didn’t say something about it. Honestly though, the acting in this movie bordered on “acceptable” to “Spanish soap opera channel”.  I can’t really say how I would react to some of the situations that the main characters are forced into, but their reactions at times just seemed a bit unreal. Maybe I’m being a bit too critical here, but it just seemed like a lot of the acting in the movie came down to yelling. Perhaps this is an appropriate response to the situation the characters are facing, it just sort of gets obnoxious at one point. Eh. Maybe the real problem here is the dialogue. Once again, the dialogue can only be described  as a product of trying to make the movie seem as real as possible. A lot of it however, really seems to border on being monotonous and flat out pointless at times. But once again, I understand the motive here; most real life people don’t exactly have the most interesting conversations on an everyday basis, but some of the dialogue in this movie could have easily been edited out, and no one would have been the wiser.

I guess it’s time to discuss my main issue with Paranormal Activity, and that of course would be the scare factor. Going into a movie that pretty much only boasts about being scary left me expecting to be, well, scared. And to tell you the truth, towards the beginning I was quite intrigued by the movie. It started out at a decent enough pace, not too fast, not too slow, and did a really good job of building the tension. However, by about 45 minutes or so in, I was starting to feel bored and anxious. I was actually beginning to notice a trend.

**Minor spoiler warning** The movie itself really only seemed to try to scare you during the night scenes. In fact almost the entire movie can be broken into two segments. The first being the day scenes AKA, the drawn out talking scenes, and the second being the night scenes, or “scary scenes”. Unfortunately, a lot of the movie’s scaring power comes from what I can only really described as “cheap scares”. What I mean by that is the movie gets you to try and focus on a specific thing or character for a moment, and then tries to surprise/ scare you with a loud noise of some sort. The movie tries to make use of this tactic close to a dozen times or so. It finally got to the point where I was just expecting a loud boom or bang, or a door to slightly creak open. These scare tactics really started to just feel repetitive after awhile, and made the movie lose a lot of its edge (at least for me). Paranormal Activity also tries to make use of some psychological scares, but I feel that these were weak at best. Just knowing that the movie was only going to try and scare me at night, made me begin to predict when something was going to happen, and I ended up predicting right about 75% of the time. **End spoilers**

The movie is also quite weak in the plot/ character development department. I won’t divulge any details, but let’s just say both main characters are quite flat. In fact, by the end of the movie I really didn’t care too much for either of them. And because I wasn’t too focused on what happened to the characters, I wasn’t scared/ surprised when something happened to them. As for the plot, let’s just say it’s one of the most simple plots for a movie that I have ever seen. In fact, let me see how few words I can actually describe it in: “A couple try to deal with a demonic spirit that has come over them.” That’s it. That’s literally the premise of the entire movie. And I described it in what? Fourteen words? Seriously? That’s just sort of sad.

In the end, Paranormal Activity’s level of “scariness” will most likely differ from person to person. But the fact still remains that it suffers from some obvious flaws. Pointless dialogue, sub-average acting, scares that get repetitive, and characters I couldn’t give two craps about, really hurt the effectiveness of what Paranormal actually does right.

See it, Rent, or “F-it”: F-it. Honestly, I felt kind of ripped off after I had left the theater. Take my advice and save yourself some money; don’t buy into the hype, or you will more than likely be disappointed.

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Time for a quick review of the new(ish) gore filled fest Zombieland. Zombieland is a movie that is well, about zombies. It tells the story of one of the last remaining survivors named Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg), who happens to be a bit of a loser and all around wimp. Columbus eventually runs into Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson) who is Columbus’ complete opposite. Both heroes then eventually run into two female characters (Wichita and Little Rock, played by Emma Stone and Abigail Breslin), and the four set on a quest to find the last remaining area that is free of zombies.

At the very beginning of the movie, the viewer is immediately thrown into the action, and from that point on things just keep on accelerating. A usual gripe I have with zombie movies (horror movies in general actually), is that they never really seem to be very fast paced. On the contrary however, Zombieland grabs you by the seam of the pants, and doesn’t let go until the credits roll (in case you didn’t know, that’s a good thing). The characters in Zombieland are surprisingly quite lovable, and I for one loved the interaction between Columbus and Tallahassee. Eisenberg and Harrelson have almost a perfect chemistry with one another, and their characters are such opposites that they really go together perfectly. Not to mention Harrelson is flawless in his part. Honestly, I think he was born to play the part of Tallahassee. Everything from his one liners, to his mannerisms, and just general “B.A.ness” make him a cult character that won’t be soon forgotten.

The humor in Zombieland is pretty constant throughout, and I found myself  LOLing throughout almost the entire film. One scene in particular had me practically crying. The dialogue in Zombieland is quite literally spot on, and all of the actors do a consistent job of speaking their lines with the right amount of emphasis and tone. Also, one quick note, if you haven’t seen Zombieland yet, and you are trying to find out more about the movie, let me warn you: Be careful of the reviews you read. There is a “special guest” actor in the movie, and if you know who it is before you go, it will certainly ruin it for you. The guest actor was without a doubt the best part in the movie, and made it totally worth the price of admission. And let me just add that the action sequences are also very well done in this movie, as are the blood and gore effects.

Zombieland does however suffer from one minor flaw, a flaw that I think most zombie movies have in common. That flaw would of course be plot. Zombieland doesn’t exactly have much in the plot department, but the truth is that it really doesn’t have much of a negative affect on the movie because of it. The film isn’t suppose to win any Academy Awards, it’s just suppose to be a fun, entertaining movie, which happens to be exactly what Zombieland is.

See it, Rent it, or “F-it”:  See it. Zombieland is a movie going experience you probably shouldn’t miss. And although the movie itself may not offer some complex story, nor a mind blowing plot twist, but it does however deliver in being a hilarious, fun, gore filled romp that is sure to entertain regardless of who is watching.

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Hello loyal readers. Boy, have we got a treat for you today. For the first time, both critics are combining forces to bring you both a Review and a Preview in one blog! The sheer awesomeness can hardly be contained in one post. But without any further delay, let’s get on with it. I present before you, a review of Halo 3: ODST, and a preview of Modern Warfare 2. Enjoy!

Halo 3 ODST is a newly released expansion to the Halo series. ODST differs from its predecessors in the sense that players no longer control the Master Chief, but instead takes on the role of an ODST (Orbital Drop Shock Trooper). The game itself, although primarily featured for its single player campaign, also contains an additional multiplayer mode entitled Firefight. And lastly, every copy of ODST comes with an additional disk which includes every Halo 3 multiplayer map ever created. So let’s dig a bit deeper and see how ODST stacks up against its older and bigger brothers.

ODST’s single player campaign is for the most part, a nice gaming experience. The cinematic cut scenes are well thought out, and really aid in stressing the game’s main theme of humanity. The cut scenes themselves are very noir like, and are reminiscent of old detective style movies. In campaign mode players switch between the game’s main protagonist (aptly name The Rookie), and that of The Rookie’s other ODST team members. The game unfolds in a Tarantino like fashion, and uses flashbacks to tell the game’s story. As The Rookie, players will scour the city of New Mombasa in search of your lost squad members. As The Rookie, players are primarily outnumbered, and because of this, the game tries to encourage players to use stealth tactics as opposed to going Rambo. I use the word try very loosely here… but more on that later when I get to gameplay.

Once a player reaches a certain area, the game switches to that of one of the other ODST members, giving valuable back story on that specific character’s events following his or her’s drop. The gameplay generally takes a switch here from stealthy, tactful gameplay, to a more run and gun style of play. Most of the combat takes place with other AI controlled teammates, and the levels for the most part (especially later on in the game), are quite enjoyable. Actually, I think it’s safe to say that the levels when you aren’t playing as The Rookie are some of the best in the game. With that being said, the game does a very nice job switching between the more emotional charged scenes as The Rookie, to more tense and action packed scenes as the other ODST members. As mentioned earlier, the cut scenes really seem to fuel the emotion felt when controlling The Rookie. Although The Rookie never actually speaks, players can still see and experience the despair and hopelessness that the character feels. But he isn’t the only character here worth caring about, the rest of the ODST team are all fairly lively and interesting themselves.

Quite possibly one of the other things that makes ODST’s campaign mode successful is the music score. The Halo series has always been known for its music, but ODST quite possibly takes the cake. The music has been perfectly balanced, thus allowing for a slow boil during tense action scenes, to jazzy interludes that reinforce the noir feeling. The music is without a doubt one of the strongest points of ODST, and without it, I don’t think the campaign would be as strong as it is.

Moving on, I’d like to discuss the gameplay of campaign mode for a bit. In ODST, to reinforce the fact that humans aren’t “immortal” creatures like Master Chief, Bungie has brought back health packs. ODSTs do have a small shield, but once their shield is depleted, they become hurt and players must then find a health pack or face being killed. As far as I am concerned, I am quite pleased that Bungie brought back health packs. It really seems to fit when playing as an ODST. Another addition to gameplay is the inclusion of two new weapons, a silenced SMG, as well as a silenced pistol. Both of these weapons have scopes on them, and both are quite powerful. However, to balance these guns out, Bungie put slight kick back on both guns when you zoom in, which makes them even in terms of usage. I’d love to see these weapons incorporated into Halo 3’s multiplayer, but I doubt that will ever happen.

One serious gripe I had about ODST’s gameplay was the supposed “stealth” element that was put into the game. Honestly, the stealth element is weak at best. Most enemies can still spot you when you are crouched in the dark, and even while hiding behind something. And as far as players supposedly not being able to go Rambo through the game, the truth is quite the opposite. Playing on Heroic mode, I had little trouble in dealing with enemies in the game. Rushing them almost always ended up in me walking away from the fight. That reminds me, another problem I had with ODST’s campaign is the enemies. The Halo universe doesn’t exactly have a wide cast of enemies, and ODST is even worse than previous games. If my memory serves me right, there are really only a total of about 4 or 5 different enemies that get quite boring to fight after about an hour in. Pathetic.

As far as campaign length is concerned, I personally got about 5 ½ – 6 hours of game time playing through on Heroic. Now to some people maybe that’s enough, but to me personally, another hour or two would have been a lot better.

Next I will briefly examine the multiplayer modes. First let me just say that co-op in this game sucks for the most part. It destroys whatever tension or emotion that’s built up by playing through the campaign alone, and on top of that, it really just feels tagged on. Firefight on the other hand, is much more enjoyable. I won’t discuss the mechanics of how Firefight works, but overall the mode has a nice feel to it, and seems to fit fairly well in the Halo universe. I did have some gripes with it however. The first of those gripes being the difficulty curve. The first level is almost absurdly easy, but by time you get to second level (not the second wave mind you) or so, it seems you are fighting with everything you have just to stay alive. I understand that the game has a varying difficulty, and that it can be changed manually, but I just happened to like the way Gears of War 2’s Hoarde mode is set up. Firefight seems almost impossible without a full party, even on normal mode. And the fact that Bungie disabled match making for Firefight may make it very difficult for some to constantly have a full party. On top of that, they also failed to include four player split screen. All in all, Firefight is a cool new addition, I just personally feel it needs some work.

In closing, Halo 3 ODST has a very well done campaign mode that makes for one heck of a gaming experience that almost all gamers should try to not miss out on. However, the short length of the single player campaign, repetitive enemies, the terrible co-op mode, and impaired (albeit decent) Firefight mode make for a game that may not justify the 60 dollar price tag. My suggestion is to wait until it gets a price drop. ‘Till then, ODST is at least worth a rental so one can experience the single player campaign.

7/10

———————————————————————————————————————————————————– 11.10.09, this is the date when the most anticipated game of the year will be released, Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 2. Not only is this game going to be huge, it IS going to break records in terms of overall entertainment sales. GameStop has already speculated that based on the amount of preorders for the game, it “has a chance to be the largest title of all time”. Ok enough of the build up as this is just a preview anyhow, we want to know what’s going to be the difference between Infinity Wards Modern Warfare 2 from its predecessor Modern Warfare. From what has been seen so far the answer seems to be that much hasn’t been changed. The controls and gameplay remain technically the same, and while nothing has been completely overhauled there are still some new aspects that will make the game a little different. Many of the old perks remain but there are new ones, for instance the painkiller perk gives extra health (think super juggernaut) immediately after they respawn from being killed that lasts for 10 seconds. If someone kills you four times in a row, the copycat perk allows you to steal their class, yes steal it. The commando perk allows you to melee further, while the scavenger perk allows you to refill ammo and pick up grenades when crossing over dead bodies. Of course there are more new perks than this but an interesting perk idea is that one can attain pro-perks, which are basically perks with more power (not all perks have this, thankfully). The weapons remain nearly the same with a few new ones but the big difference to be seen is there is now sticky grenades, throwing knives, and homing red shells…ok, I made that one up. Another interesting tidbit which I thought was weird is that one can now apply silencers on their shotguns, just seems a bit odd, kind of like real war eh? Now onto the kill streak system which has been revamped as you now can choose for the most part which kill streaks you want to use, before actual gameplay (barracks) of course. Also, there is a bevy of new kill streaks including the predator missile where you open up a laptop in the game and basically guide a missile onto your target. Another is the AC-130 where you are basically tearing down havoc, machine gun style while looking down on the entire level, if anyone has this on the other team, hide. The campaign looks ridiculous so far (watch the trailer), and the game looks slightly graphically enhanced and if what I’ve seen is right, there is a video displaying the White House, which is being attacked and it looks like it is definitely a playable level…awesome. Another good thing is that co-op campaign exists, unlike its predecessor. There still is not a ton of information on the campaign mode but Call of Duty 4’s single player had some really special moments and expect this to be the same case here. Wrapping things up, Infinity Wards decision to not drastically change the gameplay, insert minor new ideas, guns, and perks with a brand new campaign and multiplayer levels could give them the edge on the shooter generation not just in 2009 but for years to come.

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Hello loyal readers and nOObs alike. Today, I plan to review Monroe’s super Wal-Mart. And as you may have guessed, this is going to be an amazing and riveting review. In fact, this may be a better review than when I reviewed McDonald’s iced tea. So let us begin.

First off, one of things most people will notice right off the bat is that Walmart’s parking lot sucks. It seems quite evident that a kindergartner was in charge for laying out the groundwork for the parking lot. All the aisles are TINY. And when I say tiny, I mean minuscule. Imagine a Jonas Brother concert that also had Miley Cyrus headlining, and the 1.5 million screaming, Jr High school age children attending said concert. Now imagine trying to park your car somewhere in between the pre-pubescent children. That’s kind of what it’s like to park at Super Walmart.

So now that you know what that’s like, let’s take a closer look at the actual inside of Super Ultra Walmart. In case you haven’t been inside the store yet, almost every time I have been there the place has been packed. Now I know that’s not the fault of Walmart or that of its employees, but just getting around the store reminds me of taking a guided tour to the seventh circle of hell. The actual selection of food is actually pretty good. I would say it’s on par with Meijer, but probably has a bit less food that a straight up super market (i.e. Kroger, or Kroger’s ghetto cousin Food Town). However, the lay out of these food aisles is for the most part, down right idiotic. There is literally no theme whatsoever to the organization. It seems a lot of the categories of food were kind of just randomly thrown together. Maybe to some it’s not a big deal, but to me it did seem a bit disorienting at times. Also, the store had their special items that were on sale displayed at the ends of aisles; however, instead of placing these items near where their other same type of food brethren belong, these sales items were located in completely different spots. Dumb.

The “Home Goods” sections of the store are probably better organized as a whole than the food section. Ultimate Walmart’s electronic section is without a doubt the best part about the whole store. As soon as any male from the age of 16-45 walks into the electronics department, he will most likely start to get an erection from the wide selection of assorted electronic goods that Omni Walmart carries. And as soon as said male gets a look at the prices, he will also forget any prejudices he once had against Walmart for their evil doings in underpaying workers, putting people out of business and outsourcing jobs.

The toys department is a bit small compared to most modern day standards. It also irked me that they had a quite limited stash of action figures. The sporting goods left much to be desired as well. I will note though that the auto department looked pretty good (NOTE: THE AUTHOR KNOWS ABSOLUTELY NOTHING ABOUT CARS, SO THEREFORE IT MAKES THE PREVIOUS STATEMENT WORTHLESS).

The service at Super Saijin Walmart seems okay. Most of the workers were semi friendly, and asked me/ the people I was with if we needed help with looking for stuff. Overall I would say that Extreme Walmart is a pretty decent place to buy stuff, that is if you are poor (like me) or enjoy saving money and don’t care too much about the people who are working for a dollar in China and Vietnam.

Ratings:

Parking: Crappy/ 10

Food section: 6.5/ 10

Electronics: 8/ 10

Other Home sections: 7/ 10

Overall: 7/ 10 (or if you are poor): 9/10

- C.C.

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Alas I am here my fellow friends! I come down from the ashes through a whirlwind of fire, spew from the jaws of multiple fire breathing dragons all strung together as if they are one. For my first review as a non-official critic/blogger I will review Halo ODST, Batman: Arkham Ayslum, and…well how about I review a broader game, one that people gather together inside and outside to compete against one another. The game I am referring to is the game of chess.

Chess is a new game which was created around 1995 by a man name John Chess. In this game there are pawns, rooks, knights, bishops, a king and a queen. Now before I explain how the game works, let me point out that these pieces are not actual knights, kings, etc., they are actual small wooden (in most cases) artifacts that don’t resemble their name. For example the rook looks like an electric cigarette lighter and even more ridiculous is the knight, which resembles a horse. Now you must be thinking, “Why is this?”, well if there was more information on why this is I certainly would share it with you. The board used in the game of chess is checkered, basically it is the same game board as the way more famous game of checkers which I’m sure you’ve all heard of. There are two players (I have tried one player chess, which is also entertaining) and each player rotates between turns. Each piece can only move a certain way, and basically the queen rules all followed by the rook. If your friend has 3 rooks, a king, and a queen left while you have 3 queens, 1 rook, and a king, lets just say you might have chess skills.

Unlike Halo 3 ODST, the game of chess takes time, unless of course you suck. Strategy, focus, and concentration are huge elements of the game and sometimes the element of fun also comes in. I must say, while waiting for your friend to make his move can be frustrating, don’t forget to use that time to be strategical and plan your counterattack as this can be crucial to winning the game outright. Another important tip when playing chess is to have food and most importantly a drink at your side so you can stay awake and not go hungry during your hour long plus game. It is also important to have a chess simulator on your phone or itouch device that will tell you the best move you can make at the time (of course pretend like you are texting instead of cheating, nobody likes a cheater!).

There are many rules in the game of chess to go by if you want to play it correctly and I suggest reviewing a chess instruction manual to correctly play this game. Chess is a game of simplicity and advancicity with a modern touch of checkers. Although not as fun as checkers, it still has the staying power to bring you crawling back time and time again. If you’re looking for a bit of fun on a late Friday night, forget the clubs, forget the bowling alley, remember chess!

8 Multi-player: This game was designed mostly for mutli-player use, though single-player has its moments. If you remember to keep a drink and food at your side you and your buddy can play this all night long.

8.5 Graphics: The horses, king and queen pack enough punch to have you staring at them for hours without having to hopefully look at the bleak and boring game board it uses.

9 Staying Power: Single-player, a great multi-player, and beautifully designed game pieces make this game one of a kind with thrills, chills, and lots of kills!

OVERALL: 8.5
-admin2/newguy

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